When Did You Know He Was the One?

 

We always hear the classic male love story: “When she walked into the room, I knew she was my wife.” A guy will lock eyes with a woman across the room, and just like a movie, he claims he saw his future. The fellas love to tell the tale—like some internal fireworks went off and his whole being whispered, “That’s her.”

But for women? It’s different. I’ve rarely heard women say, “I knew he was the one the moment I saw him.” That whole love-at-first-sight thing doesn’t hit us the same. Maybe it’s because we don’t always allow ourselves to know—we’re too busy measuring, calculating, praying, healing, unlearning, and making sure we don’t get played.

Only one woman ever told me, “I knew he was the one when I had a problem and thought to call my boyfriend first before I thought to call my father.” That one stuck with me. Not because it was poetic, but because it was real. There was safety there. Trust. Dependability. Something sacred about switching emotional allegiance from your father (the man who covered you) to your man (the one who now would). That’s not small—it’s everything.

As for me? I prayed and asked the Lord to reincarnate himself so I could marry Him on this earth. Yes, you read that right. I knew my husband was the one when I saw the Lord in him. Not perfection. Not prophecy. But peace. Kindness. Vision. Strength under control. He didn’t come with a glittery box and a fairytale script, but he did come with fruit. And that’s how I knew.

It’s a running joke between us now—I married God in human form. (Don’t come for my theology. It’s a metaphor. Stay with me.) But truly, when a man walks with God, he will lead with God, and that’s the most attractive thing you’ll ever encounter.

My mentor believes you marry a man and make him into what you want. She always says, “God said, Let us make man,” and she means that thing. That’s her ministry. She believes in taking the raw material of a good man and molding him into greatness with love, vision, patience, and prayer. I respect it.

But I also believe some of us know early. Not from a perfect checklist. Not from intense chemistry. But from the stillness in our spirit. The way God whispers, “This one is safe.” The way we suddenly become ourselves more fully around him. The way we stop needing to prove, perform, or pretend.

So today I ask you:
When did you know he was the one?
Not when your heart fluttered. Not when he made you laugh. But when your soul recognized something deeper. Did you feel it in your spirit? Did God confirm it in a dream? Or did you just feel peace when everything else felt loud?

Tell your story.
Because women have knowing too. It just doesn’t always start with sparks and fairy dust. Sometimes it starts with a phone call. A moment of calm. A joke that felt like home. A prayer answered in sneakers and a hoodie.

So again…
When did you know?